Gobshout can exclusively reveal that X Factor goblins John and Edward are quite different to the annoying fame hungry shysters they appear. Little John told us:
‘ See, we’re actually both in a punk band back home. We’re a big deal, serious artists like.’
'Somehow this fecker Cowell gets hold of a tape of one of our gigs, calls up me Da’ and says come and audition for X Factor. Next he goes 'gel your hair up and act like a couple of right cunts'. 'Feck off' we says.
He then comes back and says he’ll make us both superstars and stick us on the cover of Heat.' 'Feck off' we says again, 'who the feck do you think we are?'
'So next day he calls up again, and says we will get a ride off that Danni Minogue if we do it.’
'Where's the feckin' gel?' 'we says.'
And what of their music career and their band? Surely they are jeopardising any future respect from their potential peers by taking part in the X Factor circus?
‘Ah, feck that. Danni loves it up the dirt track. That’s enough for us.’
Words by David Hillier
Posted In Gobshout News, Nov 14 2009.
Words - Publisher 1