Following her revelations last week that she has "experiented" with women, Fergie of the Black Eyed Peas today called an urgent press conference after her comments failed to bring with them a significant spike in record sales.



Addressing a sea of flashbulbs, microphones and sleaze hungry journos, Fergie gave an empassioned statement to finally set the record straight.



"Yeah, sure I've fooled around with women," the fist-faced singer reportedly said, "I've done the dirty with men, women, animals, everything. I'm a machine."



Glancing aside to a nodding PR guru, she continued, "Errr, speaking of machines I've done it with a PDA, a Squire guitar, a JCB, a ham slicer, a Nintendo Wii, all kinds of stuff. See all these microphones? I would get my freak on with every single one of them."



The conference ended with Fergie leaving the room through the crowd, allowing the rabble of Priapic journalists to see her dress tucked securely into her knickers.



Rumours of further revelations in the future, if these recent comments do not have the desired effect on her sales, admitting that she is in fact a man in a crotch-corset are at this point unsubstantiated.