A bad joke, terrible hair, crap clothes, rubbish dancing, a style nightmare. To be avoided at parties even though we know the embarrassing bastard will put in his usual sad appearance.
Sure if you scratch the pop-and-rock surface of the 80s there is plenty of credible music to be devoured. Within this period we witnessed the emergence of hip hop as a major genre some people see as vital as punk (if not more so) for shaking up the system. It certainly shares similar anti-establishment values. Then there was the birth of acid house which also had close links with the Madchester scene. Bands such as New Order, Happy Mondays and The Stone Roses helped pioneer the fusion of elements of dance music with the more traditional band set-ups. This is a technique that has continued to be popular today. Artists such as The Rapture, MGMT, and The Klaxons have utilised this to launch their own careers. On top of all that, grunge music started to surface and this would later pave the way for a certain band called Nirvana.
Even after all of this the general consensus of most music fans is that the 80s was still awful. So why are we starting to hear it all over again? Take Guns ‘N’ Roses, a key ingredient of the stadium rock genre that was so prevalent in that decade. They have recently returned after a much publicised extended absence with a new album, Chinese Democracy. Their sound has failed to progress very far and now it all sounds a bit dated. It has been relatively well received by some people, although the majority of these are long suffering hardcore fans, so their opinion doesn’t count. If turdburgers were endorsed by Rose these fans would queue all night to buy them, lick their lips and say ‘Please Axl, can we have some more?’. So could their return really open the door for the excesses of cock rock to return to the forefront? As long as that door firmly slams shut on the nose of Justin Hawkins and his new outfit Hot Leg.
It isn’t just that horrific prospect that’s worrying. Even bloody Keane have got in on the act. No longer satisfied with boring us senseless they have tried to snap us out of our shit-music-induced coma by going all 80s on us. Now before you start to imagine the sickening image of them in full Bon Jovi attire you can relax a little. They would never be that bold. They instead opted for the safer route of 80s pop music. Add to the list The Killers. During the making of their latest record they marinated key ingredients in neon make-up in order to create their new flavour of noise.
What is going to be next? Well, it’s time to shake the dust off your flares as disco is primed and ready to return. There is some substance to this bold prediction and I will use the sound of Fan Death to back up the point. Earlier this year they burst on to the scene armed with the seductive strings on their tune 'Veronica’s Veil'. They manage to blend in some fundamental elements of disco music and spice it up so it sounds modern. I stumbled across the track after hearing a remix of it by superstar DJ Erol Alkan. Not since Georgio Moroder first started twiddling his knob in public has the genre sounded so fresh. If you add Hercules And Love Affair to the mix then we have quite a party forming. So for 2009 forget about all that 80s stuff, that was so last year. Disco is where it’s at. You heard it here first.
Posted In Features, Dec 15 2008.
Words - Stephen